Celeste #3
What I Have Learned from Grief
Through the other side of grief I can see what amazing gifts have entered my life. Riding the waves and diving deep and leaning in, paid off big time!
My grief was the humus rich compost that created fertile ground for many nourishing things to blossom in my life:
- Grief opened my heart, at times ripping away the armour built up over my life and leaving me feeling extremely exposed and vulnerable
- My open heart allowed stored pain to flow finally be released and increased the love I am able to feel
- This increased feeling of love amplified the intimacy I experience in all my relationships (with my husband, dog, mother, sister, aunts, friends and community and now my son)
- The richness of feeling has deepened the trust I have in myself as a person and in my body’s wisdom as a guide
- I became more confident and fearless in life with so much love flowing through my body, thoughts and energy
- Grief helped me let go of deep ingrained fear patterns that had been embedded in my nervous system and psyche since I was in utero and the many times these patterns repeated throughout my life. In a deeper way, I moved from a fear based life to living a love based life = everything changed in the best way possible with this core shift that happened as a direct result of my grieving process
- I know more aspects of my true self because I have taken the time to discover my heart and my inner nature
- My life as a woman became richer and more meaningful as I softened into pure surrender, receptivity and grace. Because I did this for grief, it translated to my womanhood and life
- I am more balanced in my feminine and masculine qualities now, because I ran my masculine qualities quite strongly before as it is culturally quite easy to do and this deep dive into my feminine essence has enlivened me to create harmony in this area of my life
- I have a broader emotional range now, and have access to feel and to move through this spectrum more easily and quickly than before
- Because of this range, I am open to more pleasure than I’ve ever experienced before
- I have amazing orgasms as a result of feeling so deeply and opening to love so fully and from all the tension that has released from my body
- My sensuality and sexuality (life force energy) has opened up and I feel freer to express myself
- My body has become more fluid and adaptable from being tempered by the waves of emotional and energetic release
- I feel incredibly empowered from knowing my core self so intimately and this has deepened my self respect
- My body has less aches and pains from releasing stored tension related to past experiences I was holding onto in my physiology that had a chance to clear through my open heart, willingness to let go and grief tending
- I am more in the moment on a daily basis. Being in the present moment such an incredibly huge gift of grief. Releasing emotions and energies from the past literally allows me to create a new reference point for experiences I am having now and allow me to let go of worries of the future because I am inspired to extract each precious morsel from every moment with a sense of trust in what is to come.
- I am constantly more grateful and appreciative of life
- I know how to extract the shiny diamonds from life’s lumps of coal, and now I do it from a place of love (where before I was filtering through the lens of fear)
- I have come to discover the importance of grief as an integral part of life and how needed it is in our culture to normalize it, harmonize it, to talk about it and to create space for it
- I live a richer life from feeling, being present and enjoying the journey
- Life has more meaning because I can see and hold what is truly important in life from the small things to the big picture
- I feel connected to my ancestors and family more than ever before because I know myself more and I have willingly accepted the ancestral energies that are a part of me and transmuted some that were no longer serving me or my family.
- I am more connected to the Spirit world and have an awakened awareness of the importance of feeding Spirit and Nature our gifts of grief and gratitude in an ever renewing cycle of life
- Now my tears and grief are not centred around my personal benefit but are a type of sacred offering that is focused on the benefit to the collective, to the spirit world, to nature. It’s an act of service and love
- I am more comfortable in more environments and knowing that I have such a deep strength and resiliency within me which also helps me to meet life’s challenges with grace
- The tears of grief have a way of cleaning the sight (literally as well as inner sight) and I laugh a lot more now, seeing the beauty and cosmic humor of life very clearly
- I appreciate all the little things more, because grief has a way of bringing things into perspective. Having a good tap on the broad picture of my life, I don’t get as caught up in meaningless details
- My wildness has returned, my primal instincts are sharper, stronger and more alive from tapping deep into the core of who I am because grief is a part of that and now that I honor it fully my wildness is expressed more wholly
- I care less about what other people think of me because I know who I AM, and also because the amount of times I’ve burst into tears and had to release self judgment about what I looked like or how long the process lasted or how I was affecting those around me…I just had to let go of caring what others thought and stay centered in my experience and heart and trust all is well.
- Grief has softened me and increased my compassion for others
- Grief has taught me to arrive at my own experience without an agenda, whatever that looks like. And as a result, I can extend this gift to others; to arrive in presence with them without feeling a need to take on their stuff or fix them. As a caring person this shift has beautifully affected my personal and professional relationships. I’ve been reminded of the importance of supporting people in practical ways with love, compassion, clarity and to practice the art of truly listening without attachment, judgment or an agenda to shift anything. I can support the unique journey of others with a distinct ability to recognize what I can learn through the gift of being a witness and space holder. Though we are innately all connected and can learn from one another and support one another, this type of support empowers others to do the work for themselves where they will ultimately learn and grow the most: a true gift for everyone
- I live more fully knowing how precious each day and breath really is
- I am more patient with myself and with life and with others
- Grief has significantly increased my sensitivity to life in all ways
- My knowledge of what grief is has turned into wisdom through experience and I have had countless epiphanies and inspirations along the way
- Before I had a mental understanding of grief. Now it is a visceral understanding. I know how to ask for help and receive it. I have learned such deep lessons around ‘asking for help’. I learned it’s okay to ask for help for myself and for others… a concept I embrace but honestly had SUCH deep disconnection from before my grief…entrained as a Lone Wolf for my life this was huge for me, and I’m still learning. Its’ big for me.
- Some of my relationships have deepened and others have drifted apart. Like a gift that’s hard to open, this has taught me a lot about friendship, family relationships, my marriage and myself.
- Through my open heart and from allowing energy to flow freely I have become more empathic, telepathic, and energetically sensitive. I feel more of life! And life is dancing me alive!
- Dancing with life on a moment to moment basis is really fun!
Love…. Celeste
Creator & Curator of Grief Story Project
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